Arnold's Mean Girls
by aubzdall
Summary: Arnold and the gang are all sent to a new school after Hillwood is evacuated to become a proper national landmark. Their new school is controlled by a posse of mean girls, but perhaps things are not as they seem. Rated T for some violence and swearing. Might go up another rating, depending on where the story takes me
1. Chapter 1

Arnold frowned as he stared around the lunch table. They were all familiar faces, but they were all just as sad as he was. He glanced at Gerald, who was glaring at a bowl of chili in front of himm as he listlessly stirred it, his other hand holding onto his girlfriend's. Phoebe held onto Gerald's hand and tried to bury herself in her books. Nadine leaned against Kevin's shoulder as he adjusted his reflective aviator sunglasses on his nose. Harold was trying to cheer Patty up, but she wasn't having it. Eugene was the only one at the table with a smile on his face, while Sheena scrutinized the salad in front of her. The only ones not present from the original gang were Helga, Curly, and Rhonda. Helga had moved away from Hillwood about three years ago, about six months before Arnold and his parents had come back from San Lorenzo. She had kept in touch with Phoebe for a few months, but she'd cut off communication with everyone long ago. Curly…well, no one really knew what had become of him and his family. Rhonda was still with the gang. She was just trying to rub elbows with the four girls who clearly ran things at Windborrow High School.

Making an exasperated noise, Rhonda returned to the table, turning up her nose at the girls seated in the center table. "Well I never."

Arnold blinked and arched an eyebrow at her. "What happened, Rhonda?"

She stole a glance at the girls and a scowl darkened her face. "They told me I couldn't sit with them. That I wasn't 'like them'. It's probably because they saw me talking to Patty earlier. I mean can you believe people would be so shallow?"

Patty gave her friend a skeptical look. They had a good relationship, but every now and then Patty had to remind Rhonda when she was being shallow. "Oh I believe it."

Rhonda sighed and shook her head, "They're far worse than I could _ever _be, Patty. I mean I know I'm no saint, but these girls are just…mean."

"It's not so bad. At least we're still all together." Eugene chimed in optimistically.

Gerald frowned, "No, man, Rhonda's right. Everyone at this school is either bitchy as hell, pathetic, or just plain weird."

"That's not true, Gerald." Arnold chided his friend. "It's only been our first day. I'm sure everything will be better soon."

"You're the national landmark kids, aren't you?"

Arnold turned around to see the girl who had spoken to him. She was dressed in dark, tight clothes with black hair tied up off her face, gray eyes lined with charcol black lined. "Um…yeah. I'm Arnold."

She stuck out her hand and shook his. "I'm Sagen, one of the weird ones." Gerald glanced at Arnold, who shot him an accusing look. "Is it true you guys were kicked out of your neighborhood because you found out that it was a national landmark like ten years ago?"

Arnold nodded, "Yeah…only it was seven years ago."

She nodded, "Coolness. So do you guys need some help finding your way around or anything?"

"That would be incredibly helpful, actually." Phoebe piped in.

"Cool. Skip last period and meet me under the trees across the gym." Before anyone could protest or ask any questions, she was gone. Arnold looked at the others, who shrugged in return.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Why hello there, my national treasures." Sagen welcomed the class from the low hanging branches of a birch tree. "Where's the rest of you?"

Arnold looked at her and then back at the members of the gang who had chosen to join him. Phoebe refused to skip her class and Eugene and Sheena were too excited about their musical theatre class to miss it leaving him, Gerald, Rhonda, Lila, Harold, Patty, Nadine, Sid, Stinky, and Kevin. "They wanted to go to their classes."

"Typical." The voice came from a beefy boy, better dressed than Sagan, but a good head and a half taller than her.

"Excuse me?" Rhonda sneered.

Sagan scoffed. "Not you. The plastics. All in one gym class, of course."

Arnold and his friends looked over their shoulder at the gym class filing out into the football field. "Who're the plastics?"

Sagan jumped off her perch in the tree, "They're the bitchy little dictators of this school."

Rhonda's jaw fell open. "Those were the girls that told me that _I _could sit with them!"

Sagan smirked and nodded, "Yep, that'll be them. Only the prettiest of the pretty and the richest of the rich can sit with them. They're like…"

"Teen royalty." Sagan's friend interjected.

Sagan nodded and rolled her eyes, "Desmond, this is everyone, everyone this is Desmond."

"But _I'm _pretty _and _I'm rich!" Rhonda argued.

Sagen shook her head, "Apparently you're not rich or pretty enough."

"Who are they, and what makes them so much better than everyone else?" Arnold asked as he sat on the grass, everyone else following in suit.

Desmond and Sagen settled into the center of the group in the grass. "The ginger on the phone is Penny Lane. Her parents own and run like three zoos and six amusement parks this side of the country." Desmond stated.

"She's the newest and the youngest of them. Everyone says that she's being trained to take over." Sagen added with a chuckle.

Desmond pointed at the blonde leaning against the goal stand either sending a text message or playing a game on her brand new smart phone. "That's Jeanie. She is by far the dumbest girl you'll ever meet."

Sagan frowned and shrugged, "Jeanie's really not so bad."

"Out of all of the plastics she's definitely the best." Desmond agreed. "She's too stupid to be mean."

Sagan rolled her eyes, "The brunette flirting with Eight-Pack Eliot is Angie Roberts, the gossip queen." No one had to ask who Eight-Pack Eliot was so they saw her straight away.

Desmond nodded, "She knows everything about everyone."

"Yeah, she even knew that Desmond was gay before he did." Sagen added jokingly.

"And evil takes physical form in Stacie James." Desmond declared, pointing at the girl being carried by a pair of boys, both of them most likely on some sports team. "She's the queen bee. Apparently she's also the hottest of the four, if you like that kind of thing."

"I dunno. I kinda like the brunette myself." Sid said to himself.

"Well on account 'a I already got me a girlfriend, I really don't care much for either of them." Stinky said, draping his arm over Lila's shoulder, making her giggle.

Sagen's nose wrinkled in disgust. "Ew."

Arnold looked over the girls once more, wondering if they were really all that Sagan and Desmond said they were. The one of her phone, Jeanie, if he remembered right, looked up just in time to see him looking at her. She gave him a questioning look before looking away and jogging after Angie.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Arnold kept his head up as he walked through the tables on his way to sit with his friends, who had been joined by Sagen and Desmond. However, he wasn't expecting what happened next.

"Hey, you."

Arnold glanced around to see who had spoken to him and was surprised when he found himself looking at Stacie James. The leader of The Plastics. She smiled sweetly at him, "Sit down, we want to talk to you."

Arnold looked around, expecting to see someone else they were talking to. "Me?" He asked skeptically.

She giggled and shook her head, "Of course you, who else?"

Arnold looked desperately at Gerald, who shot him a confused look. Sagan contorted her face in confusion at him and he was just about to leave when Stacie said, "It'll only take a minute, I promise."

"Um…alright." Arnold shot a panicked look at his friends before sitting down across from them.

"You're Arnold, right?" Stacie asked, smiling widely.

"Um…yeah, I'm Arnold Shortman." He saw Jeanie glance at him before diving back into the nutritional facts on the back of her protein bar. Angie was leaning towards Stacie with a smile on her face as Penny leaned against her boyfriend.

"Like Arnold Schwarzenegger?" Angie asked enthusiastically.

"Um…I was named after my mom's dad, but yeah, I guess like Arnold Schwarzenegger."

"Shouldn't you have like an accent or something?"

Arnold expected the idiotic question to come from Jeanie, but she was giving Penny's boyfriend the same look that Arnold was. A look that said 'please tell me you're joking, you idiot'. "Actually I'm from Hillwood."

"That's right, the neighborhood that became a national landmark." Stacie put on a clearly fake pout on her face, "It must have been terrible to leave your home like that."

Arnold blinked a few times, "Yeah, it wasn't exactly something I'd want to do again."

"Sorry, Arnold, we need to have a quick conference." Stacie said before pulling the other plastics around to whisper something he couldn't here. He looked over at his own table and Sagen mouthed the words 'What the hell is going on' to him. He replied with a shrug, just as confused by it was she was.

When they turned around, everyone else was nodding in agreement, except for Jeanie who was fighting very hard to not roll her eyes. "Arnold, we'd like to invite you sit with us for the rest of the week."

"What?" Arnold asked skeptically.

Stacie continued as if she hadn't heard him, "And I'd also like to give you permission to ask me to the homecoming dance coming up in two weeks."

Arnold blinked at the Plastics, unsure of what he was hearing, finally, he stood up and shook his head. "You know, Stacie, as much as I appreciate the invitation to sit with you and…permission to ask you on a date, I'd rather not."

Stacie's bright smile was gone and she was on her feet in an instant. "Excuse me?"

"I'm going to sit with my friends." Arnold said icily.

"You do realize you've just committed social suicide!" Angie declared shrilly. "Your social life is as good as dead!"

"I'll take my chances." Arnold retorted.

Once he got back to his table, everyone began asking him what had happened, Desmond and Sagen laughing and congratulating him once he sat down. He couldn't help but smile a bit in spite of himself. He stole a glance back to the Plastic's table. He caught Jeanie smiling at him and he couldn't help but smile back. She nodded at him before turning to comfort a livid Stacie James.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"I can't believe I'm failing English." Arnold sighed to Gerald as they began walking home. The only good thing about having their homes taken away was that he and his friends all still went to the same school and lived close by. Still, it would never be Hillwood.

"Maybe you need a tutor." Gerald recommended with a shrug.

"Need a tutor?" Arnold and Gerald turned around to see who'd asked the question. It was a freshmen they'd seen lurking around the school before. Sagen had said that her name was Riley and she worked for Wells., the school legend. No one knew who Wells was, or even if Wells went to their school, but they did know that if you needed help then Wells was the person to call…if you could get to them.

"Yeah, do you know someone?" Arnold asked, cautiously taking a step towards Riley.

"Wells can help." Riley said, glancing back and forth to make sure no one else was watching. "Wells has the highest English marks in the whole county."

"Wells is an English tutor?" Arnold asked skeptically.

"Wells is a lot of thing. You want me to make you an appointment or not?" Riley asked shortly.

"No, he wants an appointment." Gerald insisted, crossing his arms over his chest.

Riley nodded, "Good. Meet me in the abandoned butcher shop on 29th street on Saturday at noon."

"That's where Wells tutors?" Arnold asked skeptically.

"That's where I'll meet you before I take you to see Wells." Riley snapped, "Be there."

"Or be square?" Gerald asked mockingly.

Riley crossed her arms, "Your friend isn't welcome."

"I'll be there." Arnold insisted.

Riley nodded and rounded a corner, out of sight.

"Man, what a weird chick." Gerald asked as he and Arnold stepped forward to see where Riley had gone. Once they got around the corner, she was gone.

Arnold nodded, "Yeah, but at least I'll get to meet Wells."

"Make sure you tell me all about it, my brother. You know how I love me an urban legend." Gerald said as he and Arnold continued down the street.

Arnold chuckled, "You've got it, Gerald."

**So as you can probably tell, this story is based off of Mean Girls, but it's not…just a Hey Arnold/Mean Girls story. I hope ya'll liked it! Don't forget to review!**


	2. Chapter 2

Arnold glared at Riley once she pulled the black bag off from over his head, not even bothering to look around the room. "Was that really necessary?"

Riley shrugged before readjusting her ponytail, binding her rainbow colored hair together at the crown of her head. "Boss's orders. See ya in an hour."

Arnold finally looked around the room. The walls were covered with posters for bands and movies he'd never heard before: Hollywood Undead, Flogging Molly, Icon For Hire, The Pretty Reckless, Sumo Cyco, Disturbed, Dropkick Murpheys, Evil Twin IV, Carrie, there were even a few posters of books that seemed out of place, like The Fault In Our Stars by John Green and Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. Arnold blinked and slowly approached the table against the wall where Wells was sitting, scribbling in a notebook. He pulled out a chair to sit down, but stopped abruptly when Wells said, "Sit on the other side." Arnold was taken aback by the voice distorter that Wells used, but he swallowed a lump in his throat and obeyed anyway. "So you're failing English." Wells said, not taking his attention from the notebook before him.

Arnold nodded, and couldn't help but smirk.

"What's so funny?" Wells demanded shortly.

Arnold shook his head and waved his hands defensively. "No no, it's not you. It's just…your voice changer."

"It's to protect my identify." Wells snapped.

"Is that really necessary?" Arnold challenged.

"More than you'd think. What's so funny about it?" Wells ordered.

Arnold swallowed a lump in his throat and tugged on his collar, "Well…honestly it just reminds me of this girl I used to know. I really miss her and I wish she was here. I mean if she was here she'd probably-"

Wells cut Arnold off before he could get any farther, "That's very romantic and all, but reminisce on your own time."

Arnold nodded slowly and quietly apologized. He probably would have felt a lot better if he could at least see Wells' face. "Now, what exactly is making you fail English?"

Arnold was suddenly alert again, "Oh, right. It's Shakespeare. I just…don't understand what I'm supposed to be seeing in this story."

Wells extended a hand. "What's the play?"

"A Midsummer Night's Dream." Arnold declared, handing over his text book. "I just don't understand why Helena is so in love with this guy who hates her so much."

Arnold couldn't see the smile, but he could feel it in Wells voice, even through the voice distorter. "I'll follow you and make a heaven of Hell to die upon the hands I love so well."

Arnold blinked in shock, "You know it _that _well?"

Wells shrugged, "Yeah. It's my favorite play by Shakespeare. And Helena's one of my favorite characters of all time."

"You can relate to her?" Arnold asked. He wasn't trying to pry, just to make friendly conversation.

"Honestly, that's not your business." Wells snapped, the softness in his voice gone. "Now, what else are you having trouble understanding?"

"Well it's mainly just her that I don't understand, but her character is the one I've been assigned to do my work on, and we're doing nothing but the play for about half of the term.." Arnold admitted sheepishly.

"That does present a problem." Wells heaved a sigh, "Alright, give me some more details on why you don't understand her."

"She's so passionate about…whatever his name is." Arnold began.

"Demetrius." Wells supplied the answer without a second thought.

Arnold nodded, "Yeah, yeah, right, she's so passionate about Demetrius even though he hates her. I mean…why would she keep bothering?"

"You haven't finished reading it yet, have you?" Wells asked with a small laugh.

Arnold frowned, "Well, no, but I just still can't see why she wouldn't give up on someone that couldn't see how good she is, in her own way."

Under the shadows, Wells smiled. "Obviously you've never been in love."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Man, this dude sounds like a dark, yet fruity guy. Ya know one of the one's that screaming and crying to bad music in eyeliner on the weekends." Gerald said as he and Arnold walked through the empty hallways about an hour after school.

Arnold shot a glare at his friend, "I dunno, Gerald. He really seems to know what he's talking about. And thanks to him I'm finally starting to really understand Helena. She's an amazing character."

Gerald waved his hand apathetically, "Yeah man, I'm glad you're doing better on your English assignments now."

Before Arnold could reply, he and Gerald were yanked into the janitor's closet and silenced with a hand over their mouths before their attacker turned the light on using their foot. Once they saw who it was, their mouths were released. "Jeanie?" Arnold asked skeptically.

"What the hell are you doin'?" Gerald glared at her, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at the girl. "You know when my girl hears about this she'll whip your ass. She's a master swordsman."

Jeanie rolled her eyes and for the first time since they'd arrived at their new school, she opened her mouth and spoke, "I'm not trying to jump your bones. Honestly, I just wanted to talk to you," she pointed at Gerald " but then you both stayed after so I'm doing what I can."

"What'dya know, Arnold, it does have enough brain cells to talk." Gerald sneered mockingly.

Jeanie glared at him, but didn't retaliate. "Stacie and Angie are formulating a plan to make it look like you're sleeping with one of them so that your girlfriend will break up with you."

"What?" Gerald and Arnold rang out together.

"But I'd never cheat on Phoebe." Gerald declared defensively.

Jeanie crossed her arms and glared at him, "You don't honestly think that either of them need to actually sleep with you to get the job done, do you?"

"Why're you telling us this?" Arnold asked, a little worried for what the answer might be.

"Because it's the right thing to do." She retorted defensively.

"Well _why _would they do it in the first place?" Gerald snapped.

Jeanie sighed and shook her head before gesturing towards Arnold. "He embarrassed Stacie. She never lets anyone get away with anything like that. She'll rip you apart."

"Everyone says you're too dumb to know that being in the plastics makes you a total mean bitch." Gerald said thoughtfully, "You seem perfectly aware of what they're doing and why they're doing it."

"Where's the question in that?" She sighed, shaking her head.

"Why the hell would you act like an idiot and be around them?" Arnold injected before Gerald could.

"I have my reasons. And if you tell _anyone_ that I told you this." She began, menacingly.

Gerald laughed, "What, are you going to kick our asses?"

In a sharp fluid motion, she had Gerald's arm twisted against his back and his face was slammed against the wall, "I'm a blackbelt. You bet your ass I'll kick your asses."

Arnold put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, "We won't tell anyone."

She released Gerald and nodded, "Good. I'd hate to have to get my nails done again .And wait for a while before you come out." She fluffed up her blonde curls before walking back into the hallway, being sure to add a bounce to her step.

Gerald looked at Arnold and shook his head, "Now I've seen everything."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Gerald, I just don't understand why they'd want to try and break us up." Phoebe said, exasperated. "I mean, we've never even spoken to them."

"Yeah, but Arnold turned down the queen bee and apparently she's out to get all of our friends now." Gerald said for what must have been the dozenth time as he snuggled up with Phoebe on his sofa.

"But why would the stupid one want to help us?" PHoebe asked.

"I told you, babe, she really didn't act that stupid." Gerald said…again.

Phoebe sighed and nestled into Gerald's chest as the movie began, "Well if Jamie turned out to be right then I guess we'll have to thank her some way."

"Isn't her name Jeanie?" Gerald asked.

"I don't even care, just shut up and watch the movie."

**Ooh what could happen next? Don't forget to review!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Come on, fellas. Can't we all just…get along?" Eugene pleaded, trying to keep a smile on his face, despite the fact that he and Sheena were currently wedged between a wall and half a dozen angry football players that looked more than eager to beat the living daylights out of them.

"We're just on our way to play practice." Sheena added, her defenses shaken, "We never even did anything to you."

"No." The largest of the six sneered, "But we're getting paid very generously to knock your teeth out."

"We'll give you money!" Eugene piped up.

"We're not getting paid in money." one of the football players jeered. "However…we could take your little girlfriend as a bonus."

The boys laughed and Eugene gave Sheena a reassuing look, putting himself between them and his friend.

"What's going on here?" Everyone glanced over to see another football player, dressed in the same uniform as the others with his helmet hanging loosely from his hand.

The biggest one smiled devilishly. "Hey Blaine, wanna beat the snot out of some nerds?"

Blaine's concern was quickly replaced with rage and disgust. "Leave them alone, Tyson."

Tyson laughed, throwing his head back. "Oh come on, Blaine, have a little fun."

"There's nothing fun about being a bully." Blaine snapped. "I don't wanna be a snitch, but I'm not gonna be quiet about this."

Eugene and Sheena glanced at each other in shock before returning their attention to the scene at hand.

Tyson's amused grin became a dark glare. "If you wanna protect the little freaks then why don't you fight me yourself?"

Blaine smirked and shook his head, "I won't fight you, Tyson."

Tyson's smirk returned, "Then who will?"

"I will."

The voice was no louder than a whisper and no one knew who'd said the words until Tyson received a lightning fast kick to the underbelly where his football equipment didn't protect him. In a flash, the attacker had their thighs around Tyson's neck and in a fluid motion threw him onto the ground, clattering against the lockers lining the wall. Another one of the football players lunged forward, but their nose was broken before they could get far. Their protector, clad from head to toe in black, stood in a defensive stance in front of Eugene and Sheena, challenging the rest of the team to take her on. Her curves were visible with her outfit, but that didn't make her look any more or less intimidating. Aside from that, the only thing about the girl that could be fairly deduced was that she was of Caucasian or Asian decent, giving plenty of options as to who this hidden hero was. Beneath her mask, she smiled when the rest of the team rushed off.

Blaine went to help Eugene while the girl in black saw to Sheena. "Nice to see you're still not a dick, Blaine." The girl said jokingly.

Blaine rolled his eyes, "Nice to see you too, Shadowcat."

"Thank you for saving us." Sheena said as Shadowcat cautiously examined the girl's face for scratches.

"Please don't think I'm not grateful or anything but…why _did_ you save us?" Eugene asked as soon as Blaine decided the smaller boy was alright.

Shadowcat shrugged, "Boss's orders."

"Boss?" Eugene and Sheena asked aloud.

"She's one of Wells' associates." Blaine answered before Shadowcat could.

"The one he calls when a little muscle is needed." Shadowcat agreed with a nod.

"Wait a minute…so Wells is…real?" Eugene asked dubiously. Growing up with Gerald he was very accustomed to urban legends, he just never believed them.

Shadowcat nodded, "He's very real. Taken quite an interest in you and your friends."

"Us?" Sheena asked, taken aback, "But…why?"

Shadowcat shrugged, "I don't know the plans, I just do what I'm told."

"And beat the hell out of my team in the process." Blaine muttered, half out of spite and half with a trace of teasing.

"Your team sucks anyway. By the way, I can get you a fair price if you make sure that nothing like this happens to these two again." Shadowcat crossed her arms, "Save me some time."

Blaine glanced between Shadowcat and Sheena and Eugene. "What're you offering?"

"A hundred a month."

"How about I take off your stupid little mask and get a chance to see what lies beneath instead?" He reached out to touch her face, but she caught his wrist in time and scowled at him.

"You take off my mask and I'll take off your hands. Hundred and fifty, take it or leave it." She snapped.

Blaine sighed, "Fine, whatever. Come on."

Eugene and Sheena cautiously followed Blaine away. When they turned to thank Shadowcat for her help again…she was gone.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"You're gonna wanna cancel that date you just made."

Sid stopped in his tracks and turned to stare at the guy who'd just told him to cancel the first date he'd made since he started at his current school. He was in a dark trench with a fedora pulled over his face. "Excuse me?" Sid asked, taking a step closer to the stranger. The young man held out a manila folder to Sid, who scrutinized it skeptically before asking, "What the hell is that?"

"Test results from Planned Parenthood. The test results of that girl you just asked out."

Sid arched a brow at the mystery man before opening the folder. It really was Carly's test results, but could he be really seeing…what he thought he was seeing? "She's pregnant?"

The young man nodded. "Her boyfriend skipped town about a month ago and she needs someone to pin it on. That's the only reason why someone who's friends with the Plastics will agree to go out with you. If you look deeper into the folder you'll see that she also has herpes."

Sid stared, aghast at what he was seeing and grateful for having such warning, "Well thanks man, you're the best."

"I'm just doing a job." he answered shortly.

Sid's face contorted in confusion, "Doing a job?"

He nodded, "I'm an associate of Wells'."

"Wells?" Sid asked. "But…why would he want to help me out?"

He shrugged, "Like I said, I'm just doing a job."

"How many associates does Wells have?" Sid asked before the mystery man could leave.

"Enough to know what's happening in this school. The less you know, the better."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"It doesn't make any sense." Arnold said to his friends, but mostly to himself, avoiding eye contract from his oldest and best friends. "I mean we're outcasts here. Losers and newcomers. Why would Wells want to help us?"

Eugene shrugged, "I don't know, but with the way that girl was I think the guy really knows what he's doing."

"Well has he helped anyone else out?" Arnold asked.

Harold cautiously raised his hand, "Well…a few days ago in the cafeteria someone told me to not eat my food. I was ready to pound the little weasel when he switched my tray for the guy's in front of me. The guy that took my food ended up puking for about an hour. I don't know if that was Wells, but"

"Believe me, that was one of Wells' guys." Eugene piped in. "It's like he knows things that are going to happen before they happen."

Sheena nodded, "He's always one step ahead."

"One fellar tackled me away from my locker when someone put a stink bomb in it last week. Never did get no name or ever got to thank the fella." Stinky chimed in.

Arnold frowned. Wells was helping everyone he cared about, helping them avoid public humiliation, pain, and abuse. Nothing bad had happened to him or any of his friends since they got there because of it, but nothing bad ever happened to him at all. True, Wells was still Arnold's English tutor, but…why was Arnold being helped with something to menial where his friends were saved from true trouble? And why him? Why did Wells have such an interest in him and his friends?

Arnold didn't know. He just didn't know.

**So like I said, not exactly just a HA!/ Mean Girls crossover. It might be a little unrealistic, but it's fun so who cares? Don't forget to review!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Why're you helping me and my friends?" Arnold asked as he took his usual seat next to Wells after Riley had gone.

Wells perked up and Arnold assumed he was receiving a quizzical look. "Are you implying that you want me to stop?"

"No no no!" Arnold declared, waving his hands back and forth. "I'm grateful that you're helping them, I really am, I just don't understand why you're doing it. Or why you're helping me. I mean…how many bad things have I been spared because of you?"

"I haven't done any of the actual work. And none."

"None?" Arnold asked skeptically. "Well why not? I mean Sid got spared an STD and getting blamed for getting some girl pregnant, Sheena and Eugene got saved from getting beaten to a pulp, Harold almost got poisoned, Gerald and Phoebe were going to get broken up-"

Wells stood up and cut Arnold off. "I didn't do anything for Gerald and Phoebe. And whoever did wasn't affiliated with me. Instead of asking these stupid questions, why don't you just appreciate what I'm doing and move on with your life."

"Well there must be some reason why you're helping us." Arnold snapped, standing up and stepping towards Wells, who was now staring out the window.

Wells put up his hand, "If you take one more step towards this window you'll regret it."

Arnold sighed and took a step back. "I just want to know why you're helping us."

"I'm helping _them _because _you're _the one that screwed them over." Wells answered, his voice icy and dark.

"Me?" Arnold asked, taken aback. "What did I do?"

"You pissed off Stacie. She's retaliating."

"But…why would she go after my friends instead of me?" Arnold questioned. "I mean, they didn't even do anything."

"Oh nothing bad is gonna happen to _you_. If you didn't have any friends here then she'd beat the living daylights out of you, but you've got plenty of friends. People you care about will get it worse than you will, if you even get it at all. The Plastics are ruthless."

"Not all of them." Arnold said under his breath.

Wells turned around and laughed, "You're talking about Jeanie, aren't you?"

Arnold swallowed a lump in his throat and rubbed the back of his neck, "Well…yeah. She's really not bad at all."

"Don't go digging that hole."

Arnold glared at his tutor, "Why not? Jeanie is a lot smarter than she acts. She could help people see that the Plastics are really horrible and end all of this craziness."

"I said to leave it alone, Arnold." Wells growled, taking a step forward. He wasn't as tall as Arnold was, but that didn't give him any less confidence.

"Well why should I? She deserves a chance just as much as anyone." Arnold declared.

Wells grabbed Arnold's wrist and held it tightly, making Arnold wince. "I said to leave it alone and that's what you're going to do."

"No!" Arnold shouted, yanking his hand free and throwing Wells across the room in the process without meaning to. Wells tripped over something before he fell onto the groud with a loud thud, his hat, glasses, and voice distortor flying away. Arnold stared at what he did, shocked at himself, but even more shocked upon the fact that he was actually looking at Wells. He didn't look like much. He was pale with dark eyes and short black hair. However, he wasn't someone that Arnold had ever seen at school before.

"Get out." Wells growled.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to-" Arnold began, moving to help Wells up.

"I SAID GET OUT!"

Arnold jumped back, startled. "I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"RILEY!" Wells shouted.

Arnold spun around when the door opened and Riley came in. She was always nearby, but Arnold never thought she'd be quite so close. "What's going on b-" She stopped once she took the scene in. She blinked and stared aghast at Arnold and Wells. "I don't…what…" Her face darkened and she turned on Arnold, "What did you do?"

Wells stood up and dusted himself off, "Mister Shortman is done for the day. Get him far away from here…and cancel all of his upcoming appointments."

Arnold tried to stammer an apology, but Riley pulled a sack over his head before he could get the words out.

"Oh and find Shadowcat. Tell her that our latest upcoming plan with his friends is canceled." Wells said coldly.

Arnold's blood went cold.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"So lemme get this straight." Sagan asked at lunch, "You actually _saw _Wells?" Arnold nodded, "Was he liked all Phantom of the Opera blood and guts?"

Arnold's nose wrinkled, "No, he looked perfectly normal."

"And you pissed off the guy that was keeping us from getting our butts whipped every day." Gerald challenged.

Arnold frowned. Gerald was right. He'd royally screwed one of his friends over. The worst part was, he didn't know who.

"It's ok, we'll all just be on our guard more than usual." Lila recommended, "I'm ever so certain nothing too bad will happen."

"Ginger snap's right." Desmond said, "Wells isn't a big enough dick to let anything really bad happen to anyone that doesn't deserve it. You however…I'd be careful if I were you."

Arnold swallowed a lump in his throat. "I really just hope he'll accept my apology."

"Maybe he will and maybe he won't. Who is it?" Sagen asked.

"I think that Wells is mad at me enough. I really don't wanna push his buttons anymore." Arnold said.

Sagan shrugged, and the rest of the group dropped the subject.

"I have some news as well." Phoebe piped up, "It's not nearly as pressing or important as Arnold's was, but…it might interest some of you."

"What's up, babe?" Gerald asked through a mouthful of bread.

"I got an email from Helga last night." Phoebe admitted cautiously.

Everyone perked up, save for Sagan and Desmond.

"Helga, really?" Arnold asked. "How is she?"

"She says she's good and wanted to know how everyone was doing. She heard about us having to leave. She also says she's really busy lately, but she's going to make an effort to keep in touch. I don't know if she was implying she'd be keeping in touch with everyone or just me, but that's still what she said."

"Where's she living?" Lila asked sweetly.

"I'm not sure, but the email did arrive at an obscene hour and she's using a United Kingdom email address so I'm sure she's still overseas somewhere."

Everyone began working on messages they wanted Phoebe to give to Helga, some longer and more sincere than others. Arnold frowned as he thought of what to tell Helga G. Pataki. He was happy to hear from her, but he would have been even happier if she was with them. At the end of the message he added his email address and, after a considerable debate, informed her that he missed her.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Jeanie screamed as she was yanked into the janitor's closet, but a hand over her mouth muffled her. The door shut and she bit hard on her captor's hand and with a shout, he released her. She grabbed his arm and threw him over her hip. She hadn't been lying about the black belt.

:Arnold?" She asked once she saw who it was. "What the hell are you doing?" She snapped, siezing his arm and helping him up.

"You weren't kidding about kicking our asses, were you?" Arnold groaned, twisting his back to pop it back into place.

"Obviously not." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. "Now what's the big idea."

"You're one of Wells' people, right?"

Her face became shocked and she clapped a hand over his mouth, "Don't say stuff like that. It could get people thinking that I _am _with Wells, and I'd rather not die, thank you. I'm not with him. I don't even know who the guy is."

Arnold arched an eyebrow at her, "You won't die."

"Oh you don't know how crazy these bitches are." Jeanie snapped. "I haven't talked to Wells since ninth grade."

Arnold blinked rapidly, "Wait a minute, so you _do _know Wells?"

She shrugged, "It was a long time ago. He gave me some good advice and we haven't spoken since."

"What advice?"

"It's none of your business, just drop it." She sneered, "Why're you so concerned anyway?"

"I…I need to apologize to him."

"Well then talk to Riley. She's the only person that openly knows jack squat about him. And next time you feel the need to drag me into a closet, don't." She snapped, shutting the door on his face.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Hey Shortman. You're up late. Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

Arnold looked up from his computer as his grandpa let himself into his room. "Hey grandpa. I couldn't fall asleep so I figured I'd try and work on my English paper."

"Well you've got school in the morning so you'd better wrap it up pretty quick." Phil recommended.

Arnold smiled, "I will, Grandpa. Goodnight." Arnold sighed once his grandpa left his room and saved his paper before closing the window. He was about to shut off his computer when an alert rang, informing him that he had an email. Curiosity got the better of him and her opened it, smiling upon reading.

_Hey Football Head_

_Sorry to hear about the neighborhood. Bob kind of freaked out. He was so mad that he didn't sell our old place when we had the chance. It must suck to be somewhere new, but at least you've got the gang. Things are fine with me, I guess. Bob's making the move from having a national company to an international one so we're bumming around Europe still. It's not bad. Kind of cold and people look at me like I'm a freak because I sound an American and most people think Americans are idiots or something. Lucky for me I'm still good at doing impressions so I can make fun of all of their accents whenever I want. _

_Phoebe told me about what's going on at your new school. I'm really sorry to hear about that. Sounds to me like this Wells guy is a jerk. Maybe I'll talk my dad into letting me skip out on family crap this Christmas break and I can teach him a lesson. Old Betsy and the Five Avengers could use a work out. _

_Don't tell anyone I said it, but I miss you too, Football Head. Don't hesitate to email me whenever. I kinda got grounded from my phone and I don't do letters since we're moving around so much. Hope to hear from you soon. -Helga._

Arnold smiled once he finished reading the email and began typing.

**Yep…lots of drama in this chapter. It came out pretty fast cause I had to get it out of my system. Anyway, yep here it be. Hope you guys liked it. Don't forget to review!**


	5. Chapter 5

It had been a week and nothing bad had happened. It was making Arnold more and more nervous by the day. What were the Plastics planning and why was it taking them so long to follow through with their plans. He kept a watchful eye on his friends, and he tried to be subtle about it but apparently stealth wasn't one of his strong suits. In his history class, which was the only class he shared with a plastic (to his relief it was Jeanie) he received a note from said Plastic telling him that if he kept acting as jumpy as an overexcited golden retriever about to void their bladder then it would only get worse and the more he'd have to wait and the worse it would be. She offered him a sympathetic smile when he glanced at her after reading the note, but that was the last time they'd communicated. He tried calming down after that, but it wasn't as easy as Jeanie made it sound.

He didn't become calm about anything at school until Riley pulled him aside one day and told him that Wells had reconsidered and was still going to help Arnold and his friends. Arnold was a bit dismayed to discover that Wells had decided it would be best to discontinue their tutoring.

The best part of Arnold's days were always when Helga sent him an email. She said that she was in detetion, but when she told Arnold _why _she was in detention he couldn't help but laugh. She was still very funny and witty. He didn't believe all the things he was learning about her that he didn't know before. He assumed she was teaching kids how to play piano when she said she was starting to get sick of playing the Rowboats song on the piano. She said that she'd hated kids before her sister had two, and now she loved them (to a degree).

In history, one day, he'd been so distracted thinking about her that he didn't even realize that his teacher had called his name. "What?" Arnold asked dumbly.

The classroom errupted in laughter, "Well I think we all know which project is going to be the worst." A boy chuckled, "The dumbest girl in the class got paired with this nimrod."

Arnold blinked in confusion before his gaze fell upon Jeanie, who was blushing and staring at her desk.

"Let's hope they don't breed while they're doing their homework." Another one of their classmates chimed in.

The bell rang and the students filed out of the classroom. Arnold intercepted Jeanie before she could leave. "I don't think you're stupid."

She raised an eyebrow at him, "Yeah, I know."

"Do you wanna get started on the project later today?"

"Let me check real quick." She said, pulling out her phone and checking her calendar. "I'm free at six."

"Great. My house or yours?"

Jeanie looked a bit worried at how to answer this question. "Um…we can do my house. I have to stick around after five since my parents are going out of town this weekend."

"Great. Um…where do you live?"

She pulled a pen out of her bag and wrote her number on his hand. "Text me when you're leaving and I'll send it to you."

Arnold glanced at his palm before nodding to her, "Alright, I'll see you later."

She nodded and started making her way to her car when she was intercepted by the rest of the Plastics. "Angie saw you talking to him and giving him your number. What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Jeanie looked at Stacie blankly. "We have a history project to do. I was just giving him my number so we could set up a time."

"Since when do you care about school projects?" Angie asked, sounding genuinely confused.

"I'm failing almost everything. If I don't get a better grade my parents are going to take away my phone, my car, _and _they'll make me stop modeling."

The Plastics gasped. The one thing that Jeanie had that no one else had was the permission and the ability to model. "That is like so mean." Penny whined.

"I know." Jeanie agreed, halfheartedly.

"Well then you have to try and get better grades." Angie declared.

"…I know." Jeanie said blandly. "I gotta go though."

"What?" the other three Plastics snapped.

"I have a go-see." Jeanie said with a shrug.

"Oh." The other girls sighed simultaneously.

"Well you better get the job this time be-yotch." Stacie said in a cheery tone. "Good luck." Stacie blew her a kiss and the other girls went to join Stacie, probably at the mall. Jeanie watched, shaking her head before stepping into her car. She started the engine and fastened her seatbelt. She sighed sent a text message before putting the car into drive and pulling out of the school parking lot.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Arnold pulled on his jacket and collected his backpack. His phone rang just before he opened his door to leave. He checked the ID before answering. "Hey Phoebe, what's up?"

"_Hi Arnold. Listen…I know this might sound strange, but have you checked your email since school got out by any chance?'_

Arnold's nose wrinkled in confusion. "Um…no. Why do you ask?" He brought his desktop out of sleep mode and typed in his email address and password.

"_It's Helga. I've just received a rather peculiar message from her and I was wondering if you'd gotten anything like it."_

Arnold's eyes narrowed when the only email in his inbox was, in fact from Helga and had arrived at about three in the afternoon. "Yeah, I have an email from Helga…it came at about three. That's a little weird."

"_That's when I got mine as well." _

"'I'm sorry I lied.'" Arnold read the email aloud.

"_That's what she said to me as well!" _Phoebe exclaimed.

"Well…why didn't she say what she lied about?" Arnold asked, more himself than Phoebe.

"_I'm not sure, Arnold, but Helga does like to be cryptic about things. I'm sure it's nothing serious, I'm just a bit concerned."_

"Yeah, I am too…I don't think there's anything we can do about it now, though."

"_Yes, you're right. I'll keep you posted if she says anything strange like this again." _

"Yeah, so will I. I'll talk to you later, Pheebs." Arnold hung up his phone and stared at the message, rereading it over and over again. What on earth was Helga talking about?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Arnold stepped out of his car and stared at Jeanie's house in awe. It was massive and beautiful. Segan hadn't been lying when she said that the Plastics were ridiculously rich. He would be lying if he didn't admit to feeling less significant in the building's presence. Heaving a sigh, he adjusted his backpack onto his shoulder and approached the house, ringing the doorbell.

He expected a butler or a maid to answer the door and was surprised when Jeanie was the one who answered it.

"Don't freak out." she said shortly.

Arnold raised an eyebrow at her, still standing on her porch. "Huh?"

"Just…don't freak out." She repeated.

"Why would I freak out?" Arnold asked, "I mean aside from the fact that your house is almost as big as the school."

She crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow at him, "It's not _that _big."

"It's pretty big." Arnold challenged.

"That's not-" She cut herself off and released an irritated huff. "Do you want a soda or something?"

"Yeah, that'd be great." She nodded and led him into the kitchen. "So who did you want do our project on?"

"Hooker." She said shortly.

Arnold raised an eyebrow at her. "Um…it's supposed to be someone from the civil war. Not…prostitutes."

She pulled her lips into her mouth and shook her head. "Joseph Hooker."

"Oh." Arnold rubbed the back of his neck, "Um…who was he?"

Jeanie handed him a soda and poured herself a glass of water. "Not exactly sure. All I know is that he's the reason why prostitutes are called hookers. He thought the boys bumping uglies was good for moral or something."

Arnold's soda sprayed out of his mouth and all over Jeanie. "I'm so sorry!" Arnold said through his laughter.

"It's fine." Jeanie said, a trace of a smile on her face as she wiped her face off with a nearby towel.

"I still don't know what I'm not supposed to be freaking out about." Arnold admitted with a shrug.

"Oh." Jeanie's voice dropped. "Um…well there's actually two things."

"Like?" Arnold pressed as he slid onto one of the stools at the island in the kitchen.

"Well for starters there's our rat killer." She said with a shrug.

"A cat?" Arnold laughed lightly, "I have a pet _and _a swarm of animals that follows me and my family around."

"He's not a cat. And…also…my parents are going to be here pretty soon."

Arnold blinked, confused. "I thought you said your parents were going out of town."

"They are." She winced when she heard the door open and shut. "They just…forgot something."

"B, you're really blowing this out of proportion."

"I'm not blowing anything out of proportion, we're going to be late checking into the hotel. And who's car is parked out front?"

Arnold froze. Where…where had he heard those voices before?

"It's Arnold's, dad." Jeanie shouted, "He's here to work with me on our history project, remember?"

"Oh, yeah that's right. Well you know the rules about boys in the house, little lady."

"Yeah yeah, the only one allowed in my room is Zeplin, I know." She sighed and shook her head.

"Honey, where's your dad's wallet?" Jeanie's mom asked.

"He left it in the fridge again. I put it by the key hooks." Jeanie answered.

Jeanie's mom came into the kitchen and siezed the wallet. "Thanks sweetie."

"No problem, mom."

"Miriam, we gotta go."

"Right right, I'm coming, B. Buh bye, sweetie! Make sure you call us on Sunday!"

Arnold stared at the family in shock. It couldn't…it wasn't…could it?

"Oh Zeplin, there you are."

Jeanie said affectionately as a massive lizard crawled up her body and onto the island. Arnold saw the reptile and with a shout he jumped back and fell out of the chair with a loud thud. Jeanie leaned across the island and looked down at him with a quizzical expression.

"Helga?" he finally managed to spit out.

She chuckled and shook her head, "I _told_ you not to freak out."

**Holy mad cow disease Batman! Yes, it is true. Now review my pretties! Mwhahahahaha!**


	6. Chapter 6

"This is some sort of a joke!" Arnold shouted, climbing onto his feet. "I mean… you can't be Helga."

"Sorry to break it to ya, football head, but I am." She stated with a roll of her eyes.

"No! Helga just got detention for pushing some guy into a well!"

She laughed, "Yeah, I didn't get detention for that when it actually happened, but I sure as hell got in a lot of trouble. Totally worth it though."

"Helga plays the piano!"

"You're just going to have to take my word on that one." She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well if you're really Helga then why did you wait so long to tell me?" He didn't realize he was shouting until the words were out of his mouth. "Why wouldn't you tell Phoebe or anyone else?"

She sighed and rolled her eyes, "Honestly, I wasn't going to tell anyone at all. In fact, that email I sent to you and Phoebe was supposed to be my last one. Bob and Miriam kind of forced my hand on that one."

"But you're not Plastic! You're not…Jeanie. Jeanie doesn't even tie into your name at all."

"Aren't we going to do this stupid project?" She asked, exasperated.

"The _project_?" Arnold exclaimed. "You just drop a bomb like this on me and expect me to just…not bat an eye?"

"Actually I was hoping you wouldn't notice."

"Wouldn't…this is insane! You're not Helga! Helga would never let herself become Plastic!"

"You think I wanted this?" Helga had finally raised her voice, taking a bold step around the table, scooping her monitor lizard off of the island and putting him on the ground where he scampered off. "I didn't really have a choice in all of this."

Arnold took a step forward, glaring down at her. "There's always a choice."

"Oh really?" she sneered.

Their noses were only a few inches apart, "This is a joke. It doesn't make any sense."

"You just don't know jack shit." She snarled.

"Well then maybe I would if you'd answer some of my questions. Or maybe _prove_ it."

"You want proof?" She asked with a dark laugh.

"I wouldn't mind some!" he challenged.

She frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. "Fine, moron, you asked for it."

She turned on her heel and left the room, leaving Arnold feeling very flustered and confused. Jeanie couldn't be Helga. She wasn't. It just didn't make sense. If she was Helga then he would have noticed…wouldn't he? She returned and slammed a photo album onto the island. He glanced at the book and then back to her. Her arms crossed over her and she glared at him. "I'm everywhere, yet I'm nowhere, but mostly I'm everywhere."

His jaw dropped and he opened the album. She quickly grabbed the first few pages and turned them before he could see them. He began thumbing through the pictures. It had been so long since he'd seen that little girl. She glared at him from the cloud of their friends. He paused when he came to the pages with the pictures of them and their class in San Lorenzo. The last one was a candid shot of him, his parents, and Helga, Arnold looking and laughing with his dad as Helga seemed to be recounting a story to his mother.

"Is this…are you…is this really…you?" He asked once the words got out of his mouth.

She shook her head and a ghost of a smile danced on her mouth as she sat next to him. "Keep going."

He glanced at her a frowned, but continued. Nothing much changed until she was about thirteen. That was the year she and her parents had left Hillwood. She hadn't been lying about Europe. There were a few pictures of her and her parents in Paris. There was a series of photos of her dancing in the puddles during a rainstorm in front of the Eiffel Tower, the last three showing her slipping, falling, and then laughing about it. He smiled at them and shook his head. There was a photo of her holding one of Olga's children, and another of the two sisters at the piano, Olga looking quite alarmed at the instrument as Helga laughed. The thing was…she still looked like Helga. Little to no makeup, not that she needed it, her thick monobrow was still firmly in place, and she didn't wear the same kind of clothes that she wore now. In the year that she turned fifteen and started high school, a drastic change was made. Two well manicured brows rather than one, make up where there had once been none, and her hair went from being in a ponytail all the time to always being well done and perfect.

"I don't understand." He said as soon as he got to her high school years.

She seized the book and listlessly shut it. "It's a long story." She pulled it into her chest and moved to return it.

He seized her shoulder and stopped her, "Helga."

Her body tensed at her name. "Wow."

He furrowed a brow, "Well you're easily wowed."

"I saw your face and wow." She stated sarcastically making herself laugh. "Damn I forgot how stupid that song was."

"So you're saying that I'm the reason you're wowing?" He had to smirk and cross his arms over his chest.

She sighed and avoided his gaze, "It's just…been a _really _long time since I've been called my actual name. You know, except for my parents and stuff."

He cautiously put his hand under her chin and forced her to look up at him. She smiled uncomfortably as he scrutinized her features. Once he saw it… "I…feel really stupid."

"Well that wasn't exactly-"Helga was cut off when Arnold suddenly pulled her into a bone crushing embrace. She made a strangled noise and tried wiggling out of his grasp.

"You have so much explaining to do." He chuckled, blissfully unaware of how tightly he was holding her.

She managed to free one of her arms. She could have easily hit him and gotten away that way, but she decided against that. Instead, she rapidly struck his arm, "I can't explain if I'm dead." She gasped.

Arnold rapidly released her, but still wasn't spared a demonic glare followed by a firm shove that nearly sent Arnold on his backside. To her surprise, he only laughed.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"What the hell happened?"

Sheena looked up and rubbed the tears out of one of her eyes. She sighed and shook her head. She was grateful to Blaine for helping her, but she just wasn't in the mood for anymore football players. "Please go away, I'm fine."

And she was. She'd seen plenty of people go through a lot worse. Still, Blaine but a hand under her chin and pulled her face around to get a better look at her black eye. His concern instantly became anger. "Tyson did this, didn't he?"

She hesitated, but then nodded.

He helped her onto her feet, "Come on, I'll take you home."

"You don't have to do this. It's not what you're getting paid to do." Sheena couldn't help the spite in her words.

He put himself in her line of sight, "I'm not getting paid to do this."

"What?" She asked skeptically.

He shook his head, "Wells doesn't pay anyone. I'm doing this because I want to keep you and Eugene safe."

She blinked a few times before saying, "But Shadowcat said-"

"Shadowcat and I are friends. That was a ruse in case anyone was watching us." He interrupted.

"You know who she is?"

He nodded, "Yes, now let's get a steak on that eye."

She winced. "I'd rather not. I'm a vegetarian."

He smiled down at her, "Then let's get a bag of frozen peas on that eye."

She couldn't help but smile back and nod.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"You're still avoiding the question." Arnold whispered as he took a handful of popcorn from the bowl between them.

"You were avoiding the homework." She answered shortly, not taking her gaze from the television.

"So making popcorn and turning on Evil Twin is the way to remedy that?" He teased.

"You can go if you're too scared." She challenged.

"I'm not scared." He declared.

Arnold watched the screen, steadying his nerves for the upcoming 'scary' scene. Part of him wished for the horror movie cliché. Helga would get scared and scream and jump into his arms. He shook his head, as if that would get the thought out of his mind. Still, he was ready if it happened.

With a loud crack, the evil twin burst through the door on the screen.

Arnold and Helga screamed in unison when the door to leading to the patio opened, slamming against the wall as a shaded figure walked in. In a panic, Helga jumped into Arnold's lap and held onto him tightly before she seized the bowl of popcorn and flung it across the room, hitting the intruder in the forehead.

"GOOD SHOT!" Arnold screamed, holding tightly on to Helga, terror and panic still in his voice.

"THANKS, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!" She released another blood curdling scream when the intruder straightened and rubbed their head.

Arnold picked her up and carried her for a few steps before setting her on the ground. She took his hand and led him down the corridor. She pulled them into a guest room and slammed the door behind them before moving for the windows, cussing under her breath when she couldn't open them.

Footsteps from outside their door caught their attention and Arnold held onto her and pulled them into the closet. They embraced each other tightly and tried to calm their breathing as they waited for what they were certain would be death. "Helga, I have to tell you something." Arnold whispered under his breath.

"Now isn't really the time." She replied shortly.

Arnold seized her face and was about to kiss her when the doors flew open and a light came on. Arnold raised a brow at the other teenaged boy he was staring at. He knew him. He was the football player Wells was paying to protect Sheena and Eugene. His name was…Blaine. That's right, Blaine. But…what was he doing here?

"Should I come back?" He asked, half joking.

Helga glared at him and threw a punch at his gut that he wasn't fast enough to avoid. "Dammit Brainy! Use the doorbell like a normal human! You scared the shit out of us!"

"Yeah I mean…" Arnold paused and stared at Helga. "Did you just say Brainy?"

"Are you don't beating me up?" He glowered at Helga.

"Never." She answered with a smug smirk.

Blaine smirked and shook his head.

Arnold swallowed a lump in his throat, unsure if they were just being friendly or if they were flirting. If Blaine was really Brainy…he had definitely grown up to be very attractive, and even though Arnold wasn't attracted to men in any way he was honest enough to see this. He suddenly felt as though his situation with Helga had become a thousand times more complex. Yet…he may have just been imagining things. He just didn't know.

**So I had to do my own little kind of rendition of the scene in Mean Girls where Janis and Damian are watching the scary movie and Cady comes in and scares the crap out of them. It's like my favorite part of the movie. And yes, Blaine is Brainy. There's more unmentioned characters out there. Hope yall enjoyed my dramatic horror movie fest. Don't forget to review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**So there's lots of Helnold in this chapter (there's been lots of Helnold in the last two chapters, but still bear with me). You also get the explaination in this chapter so…yay!**

Arnold couldn't help but scowl out the window to where Helga and Brainy were talking. He couldn't tell what they were saying, but he could tell that Brainy was upset about Helga and she was annoyed with him. A few times she looked like she might hit him right in the face. To Arnold's dismay, he found himself wishing that she would. After what felt like hours, but was really only a few minutes, they both returned into the house.

"So the cat's out of the bag then." Brainy said shortly as he walked around Arnold and to the fridge.

"If you aren't nice I'll hit you so hard that you're junk will concave." Helga snapped as she shut the door behind her.

"You're a lawsuit waiting to happen." Brainy teased, pushing a bottle of cranberry juice in Helga's direction.

She smirked and siezed the beverage. "Lucky for me my parents can afford it."

Arnold swallowed lump in his throat asking the question that had been plaguing his mind since Brainy had found them in the closet. "So are you two dating?"

Helga's cranberry juice sprayed out of her mouth and nose and Brainy stared at Arnold in shock and disbelief before he joined Helga in a chorus of chortles.

"My god that's _disgusting_." Helga said once she'd stopped coughing.

"It'd be light dating Lucy." Brainy chimed in, laughing.

Arnold's face contorted in confusion. "Who?"

"His little sister." Helga giggled. "Oh man that would be awkward."

"I mean, yeah we go to dances and stuff together" Brainy began.

"And everyone thinks we're screwing regularly." Helga added.

"But no. Jeanie and Blaine is just a ruse." Brainy finished.

Arnold was surprised at the relief that rushed over him. "Well that's good."

Brainy raised an eyebrow. "Why is it good?"

"Drop it, loser." Helga said shortly.

"Wait, who're you talking to?" Brainy asked playfully.

She smirked and twisted the lid back onto her drink before hurling at him, only growing more irrigated when he caught it. "Get out of here, freak. We have homework to do. Did you need something else?"

"Nope, just that." He took a Gatorade out of the fridge and gave Arnold and Helga a devilish smirk. "I'll see you two later." He was about to leave when he stopped himself and turned around, "Arnold, I'd really appreciated it if you didn't-"

"I won't tell anyone." Arnold assured him before Brainy could finish.

Brainy nodded and left. Helga rubbed her arm and looked at Arnold, averting her gaze once he looked back. "So…Brainy huh?" He asked at last.

"Yeah, I was surprised too." She admitted before moving to clean up the mess of popcorn. Arnold joined her and started collecting scattered popcorn and putting it in the empty bowl Helga had thrown at Brainy before.

"So are you ever going to tell me?" Arnold pressed.

He looked up in time to see her scowling at him, "Tell you what?"

"Well…everything." Arnold answered innocently with a shrug.

She took a handful of popcorn and threw it at him, earning a muffled chuckle. "There's a lot to tell, Arnold."

"Well start from the beginning." Arnold's voice was teasing as he threw a handful of his own at her.

She glared at him, but was unable to keep the ghost of a smile off her face. "You don't wanna start this fight, Arnold."

He smiled at her and threw another handful of popcorn. "Bring it on, Pataki."

She seized the bowl, which was halfway full, and threw it all in his face, laughing as he was showered with kernels.

"Hey! That's cheating!" Arnold laughed as he shook popcorn out of his hair.

"Not from where I'm standing." She chuckled as she dropped a handful down his back, making him jump up, "I'd surrender."

"Ok ok, I call uncle." he said, jumping up and down to get the popcorn out from his shirt.

"Good." Helga smirked a started walking back into the kitchen, but Arnold snatched her wrist and kept her from going too far.

"I still want answers, Helga."

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "You're not gunna give up are you?"

He smiled down at her and shook his head.

She groaned, "Fine, football head, you ask questions, I'll answer them as best as I can, and you can get this damn popcorn out of my hair."

"Deal." He sat down on the sofa and she reluctantly sat with her back to him. He started pulling kernels' out of her hair as he asked, "So where did this Jeanie thing come from?"

She released an annoyed sigh, "It was when I originally met Stacie and Angie."

"What about Penny?" Arnold asked before she could go any farther.

She glared at him over her shoulder, "She's a grade younger. She wasn't going here yet. I won't tell you if you keep cutting me off."

"Sorry." He said shortly before returning to his task.

"Anyway, I tried telling them to back off. You remember the whole 'Helga G. Pataki doesn't take any of your shit' speech, I'm sure."

Arnold laughed and nodded, "It rings a bell."

"Yeah well they thought I said Helga _Jean_ Pataki. Honestly, Jean is even worse than my actual middle name. And I'm sure you don't know it, but Angie has her way with words. She'd managed to get _everyone _to call me Jean. Even the teachers were calling me that. I think she might have found a way to get into my records. Anyway, by the time I caved and turned into a stupid Barbie myself Angie and Stacie decided I should call myself Jeanie instead because it sounds better and at least they were right about that."

Arnold nodded, "So…what _is _your middle name?"

"It's G-"She stopped herself abruptly and turned around to glare at him, "Pushing your luck, Arnold."

He chuckled, "Well there's really only two more questions."

"Shoot 'em at me, football head." she sighed.

"Why'd you join the Plastics?" She went ridged and Arnold instantly regretted asking the question. "I mean…it's just not something I'd expect you to do." He added, hoping it would avert some damage.

"I didn't want to." Helga said as she pulled her legs into her body.

"Then why did you?"

She pulled away her hair and lowered the collar of her shirt. Arnold blinked a few times before he relized what he was supposed to be looking at. He cautiously reached out and ran a gentle hand down the jagged white scar. "I got the crap beaten out of me almost daily for about two weeks." She said, her voice void of any emotion. She shook her hair oonto her shoulders and pulled her shirt back up into place. "It only got really bad once, but after that I finally let Olga buy me a new wardrobe while I was in the hospital for a few days. Then she gave me a makeover and started hanging out with Stacie and Angie."

"They did this to you?" He asked, unable to hide the rage in his voice.

She blinked and turned to look at him, "Um…no. Actually it was Tyson and a few of his bitches."

"Tyson? Why would he do this?"

"I tried out for the baseball team." she admitted blandly. "There's no rule about girls not being on the team so I figured why the hell not?"

He blinked, "I'm still confused."

"The coach was going to pick me for captain of the team. Tyson, being ultra lord jock cliché that he is…he didn't like that."

"So you joined the Plastics…"

"Because I needed some protection." She said shortly. "No one even thinks about touching the Plastics. No one except Wells."

"You said Wells gave you some good advice…"

"He told me to just cave and join their little stupid clique. That things would be easier. In a way, he was right."

"Well why didn't you tell us who you were when we started school?" Arnold's voice was starting to rise. "We would have killed to have you with us. I mean this school is so intense."

She looked at him and smiled weakly, "I wanted to. I was actually going to…before Stacie asked you to sit with us."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Stacie wanted you to date her. It would have made things weird." She replied with a shrug.

"So…is it horrible?"

She shrugged again, "It's better than getting more scars like this one." She answered, gesturing to her back. "They had to dig out three big chunks of glass before I got like fourteen stitches."

"But it's just…not you."

She smiled weakly, "I know."

He looked at her, his eyes sad and his tongue unable to conjure the right words to say.

"I'd…I'd really appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about this." she stammered uncertainly.

He smiled at her, "I won't."

She nodded, avoiding his gaze.

"So…it's been kind of a long night…" Arnold began.

"You can go if you want, you don't have to beat around the bush Arnold."

He laughed, "I was actually going to ask if you wanted to finish watching Evil Twin."

She looked at him, surprise clear on her face, "Wait a second…you want…to stay? And watch a movie with…me?"

He nodded, "I _can _go if you'd like."

"No no, that's fine." She smiled, "After Blaine's stupid entrance I really don't want to watch a scary movie alone in a huge, empty house."

Arnold chuckled and reached for the remote, "I know exactly what you mean."

They watched the movie for a few minutes before they started shifting. Before Arnold knew it, Helga was nestled into the crook of his arm, embracing him lightly around the middle as her head rested on her chest. Arnold hadn't seen the movie since he was ten so he was surprised when the female lead opened a door to find nothing but a severed head on the other side. He jumped and pulled Helga into him, embracing her tightly. She laughed and his cheeks turned red, but she made no effort to move. By the time the movie ended, Helga pulled herself away from Arnold and looked up at him, finding him soundly asleep. She smiled and covered him with a blanket and tucked a pillow under his head, staring at where he slept for a few moments, considering if she should go into her room or stay with him.

Small claws climbing her leg caught her attention and she picked Zeplin up, holding him in her arms like a spoiled fat house cat. "Oh Zep. What have I gotten myself into?" the lizard only flicked its tongue at her. As always, he was of no help.

**Ok so that was ALL Helnold. Sorry (I'm not fucking sorry). Don't forget to review. **


	8. Chapter 8

Arnold groaned and blinked a few times before he accepted that he was awake. He looked around and realized that he wasn't in his room and tried to recall the events which had led to him being on an unfamiliar sofa. He perked up when he heard what had woken him up. He pushed the blanket off of him and followed the music. He stopped in his tracks once he reached the music room. Helga was playing the piano, and doing so quite beautifully. He tucked himself into the shadows, hoping she hadn't seen him. If she had she made no motion indicating that she had. When she started singing, his breath caught in his throat and he stared at her in disbelief.

"_She was lying on the floor and counting stretch marks_

_She hadn't been a virgin and he hadn't been a god_

_So she names the baby Elvis_

_To make up for the royalty he lacked_

_And from then on it was turpentine and patches_

_From then on it was cold Campbell's from the can_

_And they were just two jerks playing with matches_

_Cause that's all they knew how to play__…play"_

Arnold's throat went dry. He had a feeling that if she saw him she would beat him to a pulp, but he didn't care. Had she written this song? He swallowed uneasily, hoping she wouldn't see and that he could soak up her voice for as long as he could. She stopped singing for a few seconds, but her fingers still danced upon the ivory keys and Arnold was afraid she'd seen him for a moment. He released the breath he hadn't realized he was holding when she started singing again.

"_And it was raining cats and dogs out side of her window_

_And she knew they were destined to become_

_Sacred road kill on the way_

_And she was listening to the sound of heavens shaking_

_Thinking about puddles, puddles and mistakes_

_Cause it's been turpentine and patches_

_It's been cold, cold Campbell's from the can_

_And they were just two jerks playing with matches_

_Cause that's all they knew how to play__"_

Arnold found himself smiling and staring at him with a dreamy expression, leaning against the doorframe.

_Elvis never could carry a tune_

_She thought about this irony as she stared back at the moon_

_She was tracing her years with her fingers on her skin_

_Saying why don't I begin again_

_With turpentine and patches_

_With cold, cold Campbell's from the can_

_After all I'm still a jerk playing with matches_

_It's just that he's not around to play along_

_I'm still an ass hole playing with candles_

_Blowing out wishes blowing out dreams_

_Just sitting here and trying to decipher_

_What's written in Braille upon my__" _

There was a shout and an inharmonic clamor of keys as Helga shouted in surprise and tried stepping away from the piano, only to be caught by the bench and fall onto her back with a loud thud. Knowing he was caught, Arnold rushed in to help her. Helga avoided his gaze and tried to shake him off of her, "I thought you were asleep." She declared, burying her flushed face in her hands.

Arnold chuckled and tried to keep her from hiding her face, "I was, but then I woke up."

"This is humiliating." she said to herself.

"_That_ was beautiful." He insisted, taking her wrists and forcing her to look at him.

She gave him a dubious look, "You're hilarious, Arnold." she said dryly.

"I'm serious. Did you write that?"

She rolled her eyes and looked away, "Yeah, but it's stupid."

"Why do you do that?" His voice was suddenly sharp.

Her eyes snapped up, "What're you talking about?"

"You shut people out. You have since we were kids and it's so…" He paused unable to find the proper words.

"Rational?" Helga offered.

"Frustrating." Arnold retorted.

"I'm not frustrating." Helga insisted.

Arnold found himself laughing, "You are _very _frustrating."

Helga smirked, "You're adorable." He gave her a quizzical look and she blushed, "I mean, you know for-"

He smiled, "Shut up, Helga."

Her jaw dropped, "You did not just tell me to shut up."

"I'm afraid I did."

"No one tells me to-" She was cut off when his mouth covered hers and before she could protest she found herself kissing back.

"So I'm adorable, huh?" Arnold asked with a sly smirk after he pulled away.

"Shut up, football head." She replied before pushing him onto his back with a laugh and returning the kiss.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Hey Gerald." Phil said enthusiastically as he opened the door. "I figured you and Shortman would be coming in sometime."

Gerald blinked a few times before Phil a befuddled look, "What're you talkin' about? I just came over to see why Arnold hasn't answered any of my messages."

"What?" PHil asked, shocked, "I figured he'd have spent the night with you after he finished up with that girl."

"I haven't seen him since yesterday. What girl?" Gerald suddenly perked up when his phone went off. "Well speak of the devil."

"He's calling you?" Phil asked, "You better tell him his parent's be in quite a state if he doesn't have a good explaination for this."

Gerald shook his head, "It's just a text."

"Well what's it say?" Phil pressed.

"He told me he'd tell me about it later because I apparently won't believe it." He typed a quick message his friend. "I just hope he isn't in a ditch somewhere."

"And _I _hope he hasn't ruined my precious Packard." PHil exclaimed.

"He said he'll call and explain later." Gerald sighed and shook his head.

"Well he'd better do it before his parents get home." Phil said shortly.

Gerald arched an eyebrow at his friend's grandfather, "Aren't they getting back on Monday?"

"Yeah. The kid has the whole weekend or he's toast."

Gerald chuckled before bidding Phil farewell. Unbeknownst to them, Arnold was contently laying under Helga's piano with her tucked contently in his arms, sleeping soundly.

**Tuh duh! The end for now, and I'd like to thank everyone for reviewing and loving on me. The song is Braille by Regina Spektor. I love yall. Don't forget to review.**


	9. Chapter 9

Helga shifted uncomfortably before rolling over, pulling herself closer to whatever it was that was keeping her warm. She wasn't in her bed, that was for sure. If she had been then she wouldn't have the dull, prodding ache in her hip that plagued her from time to time thanks to an injury she acquired while she was working towards her black belt.

When she heard her heat source chuckle, she was suddenly wide awake. She sat up hastily, shouting in pain and frustration when her forehead slammed into the underside of the piano.

"Oh my god, Helga are you ok?" Arnold asked, pulling her close to get a look at her head, hoping she hadn't hurt herself too badly.

She pulled away from him and covered her face before falling back onto the ground. "What….the hell." She said slowly.

Arnold looked at her cautiously, "Uh…Helga?"

"Oh my god!" She exclaimed, shooting up and hitting herself on the underside of the piano again. She groaned and held her head as she started scooting out from under the instrument to avoid repeating the collision again. "Why the hell are we under the piano?"

Arnold blinked at the question as he slid out after her, "Honestly…I have no idea."

"We didn't…" She began timidly.

Arnold scrutinized her for a moment before he realized what she was asking. "What? No, no of course not!"

She glared at him and crossed her arms over her chest, "Of course not? What, are you saying I'm not doable?"

"No!" Arnold shouted, "Not at all!"

"So we did bump uglies?" Helga challenged.

"No, we didn't!" Arnold answered in a panic.

Helga laughed, catching Arnold off guard. "I'm messing with you, Arnold…what time is it, anyway?"

Arnold wrinkled his nose at her, but checked his phone. "It's about noon."

Suddenly, Helga was on her feet. "Shit! Oh shit oh shit oh shit!" She exclaimed, linking her arms around Arnold and trying to get him up. "You have to get out of here!"

He gave her an odd look before climbing onto his feet, "Why?" he asked calmly.

"Plastics are going shopping for Halloween costumes this weekend."

"So?" Arnold asked blankly.

"So _I'm _a Plastic, Arnold. Stacie and Angie are going to be here any minute!" She declared, digging her heels into the floor and trying to move him closer and closer to the door.

"So blow them off." Arnold challenged, turning around and making Helga fall into his chest.

"I'll beat you to a pulp if you don't move, Arnold." She threatened, jabbing her finger hard into his chest.

He chuckled, "I'll go if you agree to have dinner with me tonight."

"Fine, whatever, just get out of here!" she snapped.

He laughed and snuck a kiss atop her head before she was finally able to shove him out of the door. Once she saw him pull out of her drive she heaved a sigh of relief and rushed up her stairs to get ready.

Her phone rang just as she finished washing her face and redoing her makeup. "Hey Stacie, what's up?" She asked as she dragged a brush through her hair.

"_Hey bitch, we're gonna be at your house in about fifteen minutes."_

"Ok, I'll be ready. Just picking out what to wear." Helga responded.

"_Do something with a throwback feel to it." _Stacie said.

"Throwback?" Helga raised an eyebrow, "Isn't that just for the third Thursday of the month?"

"_Yeah, but it's fun so we're mixing it up. Besides, if you don't do something with a throwback feel then you'll be the only one who isn't and I don't want you to be a fashion outcast."_

Helga rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the smirk that spread on her face when she opened her closet. "Yeah…throwback it is."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"So you slept over with your little friend with the one eyebrow?" Arnold's grandpa asked, sounding confused. "I thought she was in France or something."

"It's really confusing, Grandpa." Arnold admitted, "I mean, I don't even understand it myself. I asked if she'd go to dinner with me-"

Phil didn't let his grandson get any farther than that, "Oh so you're going on a date, aye?"

"Assuming I'm not grounded." Arnold said hopefully.

"As long as you're safe and you used protection it's fine with me." Phil declared.

"_Grandpa!"_ Arnold exclaimed.

Phil chuckled, "Oh I'm just kidding Arnold…well…no, you should definitely use protection. But you're a smart boy, I'm sure that you did."

"Helga and I didn't have sex, grandpa!" Arnold exclaimed.

"Ok ok Shortman." Phil laughed, "So what're you doing before taking your lady friend out tonight?"

Arnold shrugged, "I dunno. Maybe bum around the mall with Gerald."

"Well have fun, Shortman. And if you're going to have the car out all night again then give me a call first."

Arnold smiled, "Alright Grandpa, I will next time…if there ever is a next time."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Jeanie, I must say…that dress is adorable." Stacie said as they stepped into the mall. "Oddly enough the sneakers really pull it together."

Helga held out the skirt of her dress and looked down at it. It was pink and sleeveless with a sweetheart neck, then the skirt flared out to the knee with a red stripe along the bottom. If it wasn't cotton it could have easily passed for a formal dress. It had actually been given to her by some famous designer who's name she forgot for an interview about being the It Girl. "Thanks Stacie."

Angie nodded in agreement, "I was totally into the It Girl when I was a kid too."

Helga furrowed a brow in confusion, "You remember the It Girl?"

"Well duh." Stacie laughed, "She was like a huge deal when we were kids."

Helga smirked and shook her head, realizing just how little she and the Plastics knew about each other. "I know the Hillwood kids." She admitted suddenly.

Angie raised an eyebrow and chuckled, "Yeah, everyone knows them."

"They definitely caused quite a stir." Stacie agreed.

"Who?" Penny asked.

Helga and the other Plastics rolled their eyes. Aside from being good at math, Penny really didn't pay attention to anything around her. "The people who are like always hanging out with that guy that shut Stacie down." Angie explained.

"No, I mean I went to grade school with all of them." Helga insisted quickly.

"What?" Angie and Stacie rang out in unison.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" Angie asked.

"Yeah we would have totes welcomed them with open arms. _And _we probably wouldn't be torturing them so much."

She shrugged, "Same reason I never told you that Jean isn't my middle name."

"Jean isn't your middle name?" Stacie exclaimed.

Helga shook her head. "Not even close."

"But that's what you said your middle name was." Angie insisted, "Helga Jean Pataki."

"No I said it was Helga _G._ Pataki."

"Wait a second." Stacie said as they entered the costume store. "Why're you telling us this now?"

"Because we don't really know jack shit about each other." Helga deadpanned. "I mean we spend an absurd amount of time together and we don't really even know each other."

Stacie picked up a costume and stared at it while turning Helga's words over in her head. "You do have a point…we should get to know each other. I mean you guys are my best friends."

"We should set up some rules first." Helga insisted dryly.

"Like what?" Angie asked skeptically.

"Nothing we say leaves the Plastics?" Penny suggested.

"I can live with that." Stacie said.

"Also…we can't get mad at each other for anything we fess up to." Helga added cautiously.

"That's a good rule." Penny sighed.

"And no making fun of each other!" Angie declared.

"Guys, we're friends. These things are just sort of a given." Stacie chuckled.

"Alright then…who's going first?" Angie asked as she considered a slutty black cat costume.

Penny looked between everyone before she blurted out, "Angie, I told Seth Mosakowski about that time you wet yourself in the Barnes and Noble. I'm really sorry."

"What?" Angie squeaked.

Helga bit back a chuckle. "I'm sorry…_what_ happened at the Barnes and Noble?"

"I don't wanna talk about it." Angie snapped.

Stacie glanced between the Plastics before she admitted, "I used to play soccer and lacrosse. I…I quit because people gave me shit about not being girly and started spreading rumors about me being same sex oriented."

"I got a nose job when I was fifteen." Angie blurted out, her eyes threatening to overflow with tears.

Helga's breath caught in her chest when she saw Arnold, Gerald, and Phoebe walk by the window of the shop, laughing and chatting about something. She glanced back at the Plastics. They really weren't so bad. Maybe…maybe she could… "I've been in love with the same stupid boy since I was three years old." She admitted slowly.

The Plastics looked between each other, silently deciding to let the identity of said boy pass for the time being. "I hate wearing skirts." Stacie admitted. This was a shocker since skirts were almost the only thing she wore.

"I'm not really failing any of my classes. I'm actually doing really well in almost all of my classes." Helga admitted. "My parents are making a generous contribution to keep up the façade of my stupidity."

"Why?" Stacie asked, wrinkling her nose in distaste.

Helga shrugged, "It just seemed fitting. I got the shit beat out of me for being athletic. I didn't want to deal with more people hating me for being smart."

"We're all a bunch of phonies." Penny stated, her jaw going slack.

Stacie frowned, "Maybe, but at least people like us this way."

"No they don't. Everyone hates our guts." Helga declared as she glared at a costume labeled 'sexy pumpkin' dubiously.

"Jeanie's right on that front." Angie agreed.

"One more confession…I hate being called Jeanie. Just call me Helga before I die a little more."

"What about Hels?" Stacie recommended.

Helga shrugged, "I could live with Hels."

"Guys!" Stacie exclaimed, dropping the costume in her hand suddenly, making the plastics give her a concerned look. "What are we doing?"

Helga eyed a grim reaper costume with a shrug, "We're shopping for halloween costumes."

Stacie rolled her eyes, "No, I mean why do we act so vapid? I mean we have so much social power at school and we don't do anything useful with it. We could destory some real assholes instead of going after the Hillwood kids just because one of them turned me down. I mean, I don't even care about that anymore. And everyone's scared shitless of us, but we can't even be ourselves."

"I've wanted to join the Mathletes for a while." Penny admitted reluctantly, pulling the Poison Ivy costume in her arms closer into her chest.

"Then why haven't you?" Angie asked.

"Only geeks are in the Mathletes." Penny stated with a shrug. "You can't be pretty and popular and be a geek."

Helga frowned at a zombie cheerleader costume. "Why not?"

"Huh?" The other girls asked in unison.

"We're not just…Plastic. There's more to use so why the hell can't we…be more?"

"In a fantasy world maybe, but this is real life. We can't just surprise people like that." Penny argued.

Helga looked out of the shop again and couldn't help but smile when she saw Gerald whisper something into Phoebe's ear, making her giggle. Phoebe would know what to do if Helga could ask for her help. Then again…why couldn't she? "I need to talk to my best friend from grade school." Helga stated, handing Angie a cat costume as she left the store.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Oh hell no." Gerald said under his breath when he saw Jeanie approaching.

"Curb your enthusiasm Jerry, please." Helga declared coldly once she reached them.

"It's Gerald." Gerald corrected her sharply.

Helga shrugged, "Yeah, great, whatever. I need to talk to Phoebe if that's alright."

"Whatever you can say to Phoebe you can say to me." Gerald growled, wrapping a protective arm around her.

Helga shook her head, "No I can't." She pulled a few dollars out of her purse and extended them to him, "Here, go to Spencer's and get yourself something pretty."

Gerald glared at her and was about to protest, but Phoebe but a firm hand on his shoulder. "Gerald, I'll be fine."

He frowned at his girlfriend before scowling at Helga and snatching the bills out of her hand. "I'm taking this."

"Yeah, you do that." Helga rolled her eyes.

Once they were gone Phoebe said, "I know what you did for Gerald and me and it's not that we're not grateful, but-"

"_That_ was nothing and honestly just forget about it. That's not what I wanted to talk to you about." Helga cut Phoebe off before she could get much farther.

Phoebe blinked a few times. "Oh…um…alright, what did you want to speak with me about?"

"You have to promise me you won't freak out first." Helga insisted. "At least…not in front of people. People stare and it gets awkward."

"Alright, I won't freak out." Phoebe agreed timidly.

Helga glanced back and forth before she leaned in close, ignoring how uncomfortable Phoebe looked. "Well…you see, I kind of have this obsession with ice cream."

Phoebe blinked a few times before it sunk in. She took a step back and looked Helga up and down. Her jaw dropped and Helga shrugged, trying to look as innocent as possible. Phoebe looked back and forth, making sure that there were no people watching. For a moment, Helga thought that Phoebe was going to explode. Finally, Helga linked her arm through Phoebe's and dragged her into the family bathroom, locking the door behind them. Finally, Phoebe unleashed a scream that was a mixture of glee and frustration as she threw her arms around Helga's middle.

"I can't believe I didn't notice this!" Phoebe exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell anyone? Wait…why are you Plastic? And why is everyone calling you Jeanie?"

Helga laughed and covered her friend's mouth to keep her from talking anymore than necessary. "It's a long story, Pheebs. If you're willing to help me out though…I really need a hand."

Phoebe laughed and tightened her embrace. "You hardly have to ask Helga!"

"Yeah well…still gotta keep this on the D.L. so mum's the word until I say so, if that's alright." Helga said.

Phoebe finally released her friend and beamed up at her, "Mumming."

**Yay! Or something, I dunno. Don't forget to review. **


	10. Chapter 10

"There are no hard feelings, right?" Stacie asked cautiously as she handed Phoebe a slice of pizza.

Phoebe smiled slightly and accepted the plate. "I think I might understand why you did it."

"I love ya Pheebs, but now is not the time to be getting analytical." Helga sighed before taking a sip of her soda.

"Right, stopping." Phoebe chirped.

"So Penny's joining the Mathletes and you and Stacie are going to be trying out for some sport's teams. What the hell can _I_ do?" Angie sighed, poking and prodding at her pizza, picking off pepperonis and trying to remove as much cheese as possible.

"You're joking right?" Helga laughed. "You know everything about everyone. You know what's bullshit gossip and what's cold hard fact."

"Yeah I'm the school busybody, what good is that?" Angie mumbled.

"Actually, there are many things you could do where that could come in handy." Phoebe said reassuringly.

Helga snapped her fingers enthusiastically, "How about the school paper!"

"The school paper?" Angie asked skeptically.

"Yeah. I mean you'll get extra credit for it, it looks good on college and job applications, _and _you'll have a reason to be snoopy and no one can give you any crap for it." Helga elaborated.

"That's a brilliant idea!" Phoebe agreed.

"I'm a terrible photographer though." Angie challenged.

"I know a terrific photographer who I'm sure would be more than happy to work with you." Phoebe declared.

The doorbell rang just as Helga was about to take her first bite of pizza and she groaned. "I'll be right back." Heaving a sigh, she went to the door and answered it. Having forgotten about her promise to join Arnold for dinner, she screamed and shut the door in his face when she saw it was him.

Arnold stared blankly at the door, blinking a few times before clearing his throat, passing the bouquet of lilies from one hand to the other, and ringing the doorbell again.

"This cannot be happening." Helga whispered to herself as she leaned against her front door, ignoring the second ring that chimed through the house.

"Hels, what happened?" Stacie asked as she, Phoebe, Penny, and Angie filed from the kitchen and into the front hall.

"I forgot I told him I would go to dinner with him." she mumbled into her hands.

Phoebe knelt down next to Helga and placed a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Helga…are you talking about…ice cream?"

"Ice cream?" Angie asked.

"It's…code for a boy." PHoebe answered reluctantly.

"Wait a minute." Stacie held up her hands, "Are you saying…the guy you've liked asked you out?"

"Yeah." Helga admitted reluctantly.

"Well get rid of him!" She exclaimed. "We need at least an hour."

"No!" Helga exclaimed. "I can't !"

"Why the hell not?" Stacie snapped.

"Because it's Arnold!" Helga snapped.

Helga held her breath, half expecting Stacie to explode. Instead, very calmly, Stacie forced the door open, moving Helga with it. Arnold dropped the flowers he'd been holding and took a step back, shock and fear on his face.

"Stacie, no!" Helga exclaimed, scrambling to her feet and trying to jump between the girl and Arnold.

Stacie ignored her. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" Stacie spat at Arnold.

"Uh…" Arnold fought to find the words, but they wouldn't come from his mouth.

"She's not ready, come back in an hour." Stacie sneered, crossing her arms over her chest.

"What?" Helga and Arnold asked together.

Stacie rolled her eyes, "We were unaware of this outing and honestly, look at my girl."

All eyes fell on Helga, who glanced self-consciously at her black yoga pants while combing through her ponytail. "She looks wonderful." Arnold challenged.

"That's sweet, but it's a lie." Stacie deadpanned.

"Like you look much better." Helga snapped, gesturing at Stacie's outfit, which was very similar to Helga's.

"One hour and she's all yours." Stacie stated, hooking her arm through Helga's and bringing her back into the house.

"Why an hour?" Helga pleaded. "It didn't even take me that long to get ready for prom!"

"Oh my god a first date!" Angie exclaimed before she and Penny squealed and they began the accent to Helga's room.

"No no we have shit to do!" Helga tried to get away from them, but the Plastics weren't having it. "Phoebe! Help me!"

Phoebe chuckled and shook her head, "YOu're on your own Helga."

Helga started spewing death threats and Phoebe adjusted her purse onto her shoulder and walked out the door, shutting it behind her. "Sorry about that, Arnold. Helga didn't tell any of us."

"So she told you, huh?" Arnold asked with a laugh.

She nodded, "She said that since you knew she wanted me to know. No one else knows though."

Arnold nodded, "You need a ride home? I apparently have some time to kill."

"That'd be great." Phoebe said with a smile, "Thank you."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Arnold sighed before he finally convinced himself to ring Helga's doorbell again. The door shot open and Arnold could have sworn he shrunk almost a foot when Helga wasn't the one on the other side of it. "You're early." Penny snapped.

Arnold checked his watch. "Only by a few minutes."

She sighed, "Whatever, just come in."

"It's a fucking jacket, who cares!" Helga shouted from upstairs.

Arnold hid his mouth behind his hand and laughed.

"She's been fighting it since you left." Penny sighed, "It's really annoying, actually."

"What she was dressed in would have been fine. I was going to take her for a picnic." Arnold admitted.

"Oh…well Stacie just wants thing to be…well…perfect." Penny said with a shrug.

"But Stacie hates me." Arnold argued.

"Oh please, I do not hate you." Arnold spun around to see Stacie coming down the stairs. "I just have a reputation to uphold."

Arnold blinked a few times, "But-"

"But nothing, let's get out of here before they decide to bombard me with hairspray. _Again_." Helga snapped as she stormed down the stairs behind Stacie, trying to get Angie away from her hair.

Arnold's breath caught in his chest. She was breathtaking. She was wearing the same dress she'd worn earlier at the mall, but he hadn't seen her then. Stacie had tried to get Helga to wear a pair of white pumps, but Helga refused and her white converse high tops covered her feet. Her hair fell down one of her shoulders in a ponytail that was crowded with curls. She grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the door. "And you bitches get out of my house."

"We're going, we're going." Stacie laughed, gesturing for Angie and Penny to follow her out the door. "You two have fun."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Arnold said nothing.

Helga said nothing.

They just sat listening to Arnold's fuzzy radio waiting for the other to take the first step. When Arnold pulled off the main road and headed for the canyon, Helga took the leap. "Where the hell are you taking me?"

Arnold fought the smile, but it was no use, "You'll see Helga…you…you look really pretty."

Helga looked at him and her face flooded with color. "Um…Thanks, Arnold. Even though I did become pretty against my will."

"You were always pretty, Helga." he laughed.

"Funny." She retorted dryly.

Steadying a sigh, he took one of her hands in his. When she didn't pull away, he smiled.

"So where are we going?" Helga asked again.

"You'll see." He replied with a smile.

**I know it's kind of short compared to what I've been giving y'all lately but I'm gunna be away starting tomorrow until about Sunday so this is all you'll be getting for a while, and yes, I did purposely leave you on a cliffhanger (hehehe). Don't forget to review and I love y'all. (I've been watching a lot of true blood lately so please don't judge me for saying y'all a lot.)**


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